Classic Game Review: Carmageddon Max Pack

[Johnnydillinger]

I wanted to be first to pop this new site's cherry with a new game review, but then again it's my first review ever too, so it's two cherries popped by the same... argh, I'll just drop it. I went with Carmageddon here because it's one of my most beloved classics which never fails to amuse me on such high levels. It also kind of has a new game in developement, so I felt like showing what the series is best known about before they release it next year. Not long enough I made a mention of it to someone looking for the best racing/vehicular combat game, and I was kinda pissed that he'll never try this because "it's old, ergo it's crap". It is a very old game (15 years actually), but it stood the test of time, and is deserving to be tried at least. I hope I can make you want to give it a go.
 
So, what is Carmageddon then? Well, how about if you take the concept of banger racing and put it onto crowded streets throughout cities and whatnot, and then mix it up with Mad Max-style road avenging and running over people, as seen in the original Death Race movie with Sylvester Stallone... Believe it or not, those 2 licenses were actually bought for the game, but they were eventually dropped. The result is about 9 times as crazy as Mel Gibson himself, so that's saying a lot. But feel free to multiply Mr Gibson's entertainment value too because you're about to have a hell of a good time with this.
 

http://media.giantbomb.com/uploads/1/14976/915131-carmageddon_box.jpg

Best tagline ever? Probably!

 
 
At the beginning of the game, you'll have to pick one of 2 drivers, Max Damage or Die Anna. If these bad puns weren't campy enough, wait until you hear about some of your opponent's names, such as OK Stimpson, Pussy LaGore, Screwie Lewie, Wanda Lust, and my personal favourite: Mother Trucker. The cars in the beginning are identical, but their names are different, as well as their colors; the only reason why I'll advise against choosing Anna is because Max is just goddamn funny. That's right, there are driver profiles in the game who will comment on things as you play. You can always see them in the top left corner, and their animation is just a primitive GIF-like sequence of images with a few lines they speak, but it's convincing as hell, and to top it all, just ridicoulously funny. When you start speeding beyond control, they both start screaming like they're about to piss their pants, and when you crash the car, you can get wacky images like these here from them:
 

http://www.carmageddon.com/sites/all/themes/carmageddond7/images/funsize/img_pratcam-features.png

The crash reaction is the ping-pong eyed one, obviously.

 
These reactions respond very well to the gameplay, and I have absolutely no clue why they were scrapped from later games. As for opponents, you only get profile images for them when driving their cars, which you can do after completing every level in the game. Of course there's the possibility of you unlocking one of these cars mid-race, but I could never gather how exactly that stuff works. One thing is sure: you have to eliminate them if you want to stand a chance.
 
The races can be completed in 3 ways. You can choose to race around, occasionally chipping in some pedestrians to get a time bonus. Going through a checkpoint will give you another time bonus, but it's hardly enough to keep you on the track without running out of time. Racing around is only the second hardest thing you can do, as there's also the possibility to just run over every pedestrian on the level. It'll take a lot of time, but it's still not as tedious as it sounds. This is best done if you have a powerup that will show them on your map. But then again there's another powerup that will make them all respawn into healthy passersby, so be careful what you pick up. The last and easiest way is wasting all your opponents, and it only gets hard near the latest levels into the game.
 
There are powerups to help you get through a race, or to make your life miserable. These are usually wacky, cruel and ridicoulous things, let me name a few. Rock Springs removes all the suspension in your car, Grip-O-Matic Tires speaks for itself in the most literal meaning possible, Instant Handbrake will stop your car no matter what (even in mid-air!), Boing Boing will make your car hop around like a kangaroo, Drugs! will create a very psychedelic view that's hard to navigate, Acme Damage Magnifier will make you super strong against enemies. Then there are some powerups that will affect pedestrians, such as ones that will make them giants, make them resurrect or zap every one of them in your 10 feet radius with a cartoony little electric jolt. One of the cars have the unfair advantage of having this powerup built in, so it's extra challenging if you're racing against it, since it will eliminate most of your time income source.
 

http://i54.tinypic.com/awoufp.jpg

Once you get to control it though...

 
There are also credits that you can earn by doing various things. The most obvious way is going through checkpoints/running over pedestrians/smashing into your opponents, but there are far more fun things to do there. My favourite is the "Nice Shot, Sir!" stunt which you can achieve by sending an animate object into people, killing them with it. But the game will reward you for doing ridicoulous jumps and not even arriving on your feet (tires?). These credits you can spend to upgrade your car. It's not all too complicated, as you only have offensive, defensive and speed (power) slots to fill, and there's around 4-5 for each one to buy in the racing menu between races. These upgrades thankfully carry over to other cars that you win so you don't have to upgrade all of them, unless you run into a very nasty bug, like I did with the DOS version.
 
Other things you can do in the races are repairing your car, which is essential for you to win, and believe it or not, it doesn't make the game unbalanced, despite how it shouldn't work in theory. Repairing will take away your money, but not that much, and you can always earn more by going medieval on the neighbourhood, so it's a punishment you'll take gladly. You can also recover your car by pressing "Insert" of all things, should you ever turn wheels up or get stuck in water. There's also the possibility of not waiting through the countdown at the beginning of each race, but pressing Y and getting ahead of everyone. This little "cheat" will remove some fo your credits, but it's a nice way to tell the player "Oh just do whatever the fuck you want already", in case the player haven't noticed yet.
 
Now about the sound and graphics... The sounds are amazing. The pedestrians are hilarious, and so are your 2 optional drivers. My favourite pedestrian is an old lady who will say "I was in the war!" before you run over her, but she does it in such a comical voice that it'll crack you up no matter what. It's a golden piece of offensive and undecent humor, one which is felt throughout the whole game. Then there are the cows that you can run over too, and they make such a ridicoulous sound when dying... check it out:
 

"Sorry!"

 
The powerups aren't exceptional either, the aforementioned Boing Boing is followed by the wackiest cartoony "Boing" sound effect that they could find, and you will hear screeching tires even when you pull that Instant Handbrake mid-air and there's absolutely no ground that should grant it to be heard. It's freaking hilarious. The music is exceptionally good, and it was from the golden days of Fear Factory releasing soundtracks for some games (the other one was Messiah), and going psycho on your opponent to some Demanufacture can be really enjoyable in the long run. As for the graphics, the game is 15 years old, and while it uses some pretty advanced software rendering, it can't escape looking outdated these days. Still, the graphics style is more than satisfactory, and I just love the variety and detail on the world around you. There are some good jokes hidden there too, such as the usual Agip logo replaced by a pig and and the title "Apig" on its billboard. These details go really well with the clever level design, which can be both punishingly frustrating and amazingly entertaining, depending on how well you adapt to them (Pro tip: leart to use the brake too). My favourite touch is the windshield on each car though; they have this old-timer game feel to them (they obviously couldn't model the drivers in there), and they look like they reflect a special kind of hell you can't see around you, only through them:
 

http://rr2000.toshiba-3.com/gallery/albums/userpics/10001/chromey2.png

Tinted windows?

 
There's also an expansion called "Slat Pack", which is now included in all new purchases, and there's not really a lot to talk about it, really. The drivers are the same, the cars are basically the Batmobile in red and yellow colors...
 

http://www.oldgames.sk/images/oldgames/racing/Carmageddon.Splat.Pack/carmageddon-sp-320.gif

Would make one hell of a Batman movie though...

 
...and there are some new tracks, cars and pedestrians, is all. The only thing worth mentioning is the final level, in which you have to drive into and through hell, with 666 pedestrians around (usually they're between 150 and 300). It's a nice addition to an already amazing game, but not anything remarkable.
 
In conclusion, Carmageddon was a ballsy effort in a time where it was even more controversial to release brutal and violent games, but its real value doesn't lie only in that. One could say that Carmageddon broke the fourth wall, but I wouldn't say that. It broke all four walls, then slowly watched the ceiling plop into the ground in pain. Then it took its way to the builders of the room and ran over them, leaving a nice stream of blood on its windshield. And to top it off, it painted a giant red "Fuck you" with their blood on the ground, 'cause why not. And it enjoyed it. And you will enjoy it even more.
 
With basically nothing to complain about (aside from a few bugs and glitches, but these are very far and between), Carmageddon is one of my favourites for a good reason. It gets its granted place on my computer basically every year, alongside with it sequel.
 

Rating:

10/10

 
You can buy Carmageddon now on GOG for 10 bucks normally (on sale for 5 now), but it's worth every cent. And if you already have it and are a fan of the series, go over to its new website where you can follow the developement of the newest game in the series, which very well seems like a semi-remake for me. I loathe the day I forgot to Kickstart this in the summer...

[Asulynn]

Cherry #3, sir. Good example of what should be expected out of this section.

 

I used to play the crap out of this game when I was younger. Nice to see a remake in the works.

[newbie]

Absolutely love your review. I'm surprised that there aren't many bugs or glitches to this game though. One thing I love about driving games is the sound effects, because it shows a whole lot about commitment if the developers even cover the most minute detail on the pedestrians and what they say. What are the three ways to win a race? I didn't quite get it. Finishing the race is obviously one, but what are the other two?